Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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