I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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