in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
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