your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
