why didn't you poke me back
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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