I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Randomize
