For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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