there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
