I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
