Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
