That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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