I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
