Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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