the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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