fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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