My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
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You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
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Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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