Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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