whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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