i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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