On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize