No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
