the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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