Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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