This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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