Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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