Whoa Z and x make the same sound
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
