3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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