I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
