sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
