I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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