her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
