Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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