There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
