Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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