you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
oh god the rape fog is back!
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
