Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
So squirting runs in the family.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
