real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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