Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
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