Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
