I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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