Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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