I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
