How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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