remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
