sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
honey bunches of taint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize