Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
My liver just had a heart attack.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Randomize
