i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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