i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
