It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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