that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
The feeling are messing with the penis
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
